I've - once again - found myself in a predicament where the ground's all sludgy and it keeps pulling me back in no matter how many times I convince myself I'm nearly out.

Yes. Another late night exhausted dump of words.

Sometimes I feel like I'm just.. not cut out for life, yanno? I mean sure, this feeling isn't foreign to me at all, I've experienced it numerous times before. But oh lord, I feel like I've been stuck in this phase for way too long recently (and by recent I mean the past month).

Work is tiring — it's the same mundane routine over and over again. There isn't something I'm able to look forward to in the nearest future — which usually served as my motivation to keep on living. Haha.

So yes, I've basically been propelling myself through life on autopilot. No expectations, no happy news, no nothing. And let me tell you something: it absolutely sucks.

I literally have no motivation to keep going anymore and constantly think about how insignificant my existence is to the people around me (wow, talk about being dramatic).

Seems like everyday just gets more worse and worse to the point where if I think about it long enough, I'd literally burst into tears. Not exaggerating one bit here. I'd find myself working till the late hours - sometimes forfeiting going home all together - and even on the weekends. I have no time for myself and even on the rare times that I did, all that time would be used up with me staring at the walls because my body is so close to disintegrating.

Long story short, I just want the chance to enjoy life again. Sigh.